Sometimes, I drop the ball.

IS IT REALLY JUST TUESDAY?

Feels like it should be at least Thursday....hmm...

SO, I have a tendency to take situations that may not be awkward at all and turn them into moments that make me want to flush myself down the toilet.

It happens more often than I would like to admit, but a few of them - I'm willing to share.


Like this one:

About a year ago my dear friend, Riley, was super pregnant and had a baby shower thrown for her. I was a hostess (one of a few) for her baby shower. There was a boat load of food involved - and food arranging and food eating and food decorating. Not to mention: she RACKED UP on adorable baby things - it was a total success. As being a hostess of a shower goes, I did okay.

We all planned on splitting the cost of the shower evenly among us to keep things fair. I got an email from Riley's sister-in-law, Ashley, a few weeks after the shower giving the total that we were all going to split. Naturally, because I'm so on top of things, I immediately wrote out a check and put it in an envelope to mail.

A few weeks later I got another email from Ashley saying that she was still waiting on her check from me - which couldn't be possible, I thought, because I wrote the check out and sent it. Probably just stuck in the post, I thought.

I got one more email from her - which I totally dismissed because LADY, I SENT YOUR CHECK.

Fast forward to a month ago I was changing out purses and.... YEP... found the envelope. Addressed, stamped and ready to go. I never sent that effing check. I had a moment of shame in my closet as I was completing the purse switch... but decided that it had been so long and I wasn't sure how to approach it yet... so I kind of just dropped it. I've discovered that this is an inherited trait: if I ignore it, it'll go away. I'm not saying it's the best way to handle things... I'm just saying that sometimes I use it.

OKAY - onto the part where I make things weird:

two weekends ago (because that's how my time is officially measured now... by weekends) I was on a plane to DFW to see College Annette, when I hear a very familiar voice with a Mississippi twang say "MELANIE!!!?" - it was Riley... and she had in tow with her, none other than Ashley. I was at the front of the plane (my logic is that I can forget it's a plane when I'm at the front because it has fewer windows... and if something terribly wrong goes down... I'm most likely to just get it over with quickly in the nose of the plane... I'll never know what hit me... as you can see, I love flying...longest parenthesis side note ever) - anyway: I was in the front and they were seated around the middle of the plane. We had a strange yelling conversation for just a second, but switched to texting because we were clearly annoying some of the other passengers who didn't want to be awake so early on a Saturday (don't worry, it was before take-off that we used the cell phones).

We get off the plane and stop at the ladies room.... Riley is still trapped inside the bathroom, so it's just me and this woman who thinks I don't pay for baby showers that I'm hostessing. Which, apparently, I don't. But not on purpose. Eye contact was minimal.

Elephant in the room.

Big elephant.

Finally, it pretty much flew out: "ICLEANEDOUTMYPURSE.....ANDFOUNDYOURCHECK. I never sent it. I'm so sorry. I thought I did.... I'll get you a check..."

She looked at me like I just told her that I had a talking frog in my suitcase.... then she, very sweetly, said "oh, that? I didn't even remember that!"... we both had an awkward laugh, and right then Riley walked out of the bathroom... so I felt the need to make it even weirder and catch Riley up to speed. Riley gave me the same talking-frog-in-the-suitcase look.... then we all moved on with our bags on wheels to say good morning to Dallas.

There was definitely a more graceful way to handle this. I can think of 3.  Right now.

Good grief.