"I know this is silly, but this table isn't for food or drinks"

My disclaimer before I type this whole reconstruction of Luke's birthday party: I have really great neighbors. Not only do I have really great neighbors, but they have really sweet children. Their kids have manners, they play well together - and most importantly (to me): They always welcome Luke during the Summer and holidays as if he has never been away. They are good kids.

I suppose I'm ambitious when it comes to events. I like having people in my home - and I even like getting ready to have people in my home. It makes me happy to have people eating and laughing in my house.

So - I decided to have Luke's birthday party in our home.

We had Luke's birthday party in our home last year... but we didn't really advertise it the way we did this year. This year people were told in advance and even RSVP'd. Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Grandparents, Friends and Couch Amandas were present - a good group of people.

With the help of Fallon and Couch Amanda - we set up the decorations, the snacks and the banana split bar. Since I'm a Carlile first and foremost - no party is complete without those little smokey weenies (all beef, of course). JD never complains :)

People started arriving and, naturally, I was running behind... but really it was just a matter of pulling food out of the fridge and setting it up - so I was done shortly and got to mingle some. Since I enjoy having people in my home.... something about it is calming to me - I don't get super frantic and I even get to have fun (most of the time).

Soon after everyone got here, we started the line for the banana split bar (which was really more of a sundae bar because I forgot to put the bananas out at first.... whoops). The kids were relatively quiet and contained and, especially with all of the sugar being dumped into their systems, very well behaved.

Then they found the party poppers.

Since the party poppers were my idea - I sort of expected there to be confetti and ribbon everywhere, but this is a birthday party, right? That's okay! Still calm. Still having a good time. Luke is having a great time, so that's all that matters anyway. It totally didn't matter that it looked like Kesha threw up a night out in my living room. Nope.

Following the party poppers and a brief moment where the children disappeared upstairs into Luke's room - Luke opened presents. He really racked up in the present department. I made sure his daddy reminded him to say "thank you" after each gift: which he probably would have done anyway - but a 9 year old at a party opening gifts may forget if he isn't reminded and then his family might be embarrassed. We know he is sweet and thankful, but I want everyone else to know too!

After presents we had cake. I started to get a little uneasy HERE. Mainly because the sundaes seemed to be taking effect, and even the best children with the best manners and the best intentions turn into little evil versions of themselves when loads of sugar are involved. Apparently they missed the table with the little smokies and the cheese dip because they did NOT have any protein in their bodies. Just trust me. Granted, the ones with parents here seemed to stay mostly in check because their parents were hovering...

Luke's Minecraft cake

Making a wish!

So as I watched them shovel more sugar down their throats and become a little more evil - I started recognizing a problem.

Let's pause here and back up a bit. I have a table off the side of my living room (I suppose it's a dining room, but we don't use it as such) that was my great grandmother's. This table is one of my most prized possessions. If my house was to catch fire - first I would gather the people (duh), then the animals... then this table. We don't eat on it because it hasn't been treated... and it's a little rickety....but I love this table. My Aunt Diana gave the table to me after we moved into this house - it immediately became part of the house for me.

THE table

 Soon after the cake cutting, I realized that I forgot to put a fence around this table... nor did I make some kind of bubble device to keep it safe. There were at least 5 cups of koolaid condensating on my grandmother's childhood table. There were several dripping bowls of melted sundaes producing little ice cream rings on my table. I seriously almost stroked out.

I didn't want people to realize how neurotic I really am about this table... so I quietly placed all of the mess producing items in the kitchen. In no particular order. Then I went over to the table and, in my most teacher-like but still nice voice, said "I know this is silly, but this table isn't for food or drinks"... then I made a nervous laugh noise. It was a little uncontrollable. The kids looked at me like I just told them there was an invisible clown in the room making balloon animals - go find him!

Glasses continued to get placed on this table, and at this point my only mission was to keep clearing them off. I wiped all the sticky ice cream rings off the table - they didn't leave terrible marks, but I should probably have this table waxed anyways to keep THIS from happening.

I know... this is really my fault. Why do I have a table in what should be my dining room that you're not allowed to put food or drinks on? Well..... I don't have a good answer - that's just how it is. I didn't want to seem like a total ass and tell everyone at the door not to use that table. I didn't want to make a giant announcement about it. So instead I chose to have a mini-meltdown over it that I HOPE only my husband, and maybe Couch Amanda, could recognize. I know I'm a little uptight. But only about that table. If you spilled red koolaid all over my black/white swirly rug: I would have been TOTALLY FINE. It's just that table that makes me freak out. I should make a t-shirt that says that...

Soon all the kids with parents present left because things were winding down - and the kids that didn't have parents here, I found upstairs with Luke's bow and arrow set - so I sent them home. Clearly it was time.

We still have mounds of birthday cake - and I'm fighting my urge to eat it for brunch.

I'm glad Luke had fun. I'm even more glad that I had help cleaning up (Husband, Fallon, Amanda....).

Next year: His birthday party will be at a location. Where someone else can attempt to control the chaos far away from my great grandmother's table - and then those people will clean up. And I will come home. And hug that table.

The end.