Christmas-y things

I sneezed on someone today.

I'm not proud of it.

A complete stranger in the grocery store came to get milk, and left with milk plus my snot.

I HATE being sick.

I tried really hard not to be all "woe is me" because it's Christmas and Luke is home and I was with family... Luckily (sorry dad...) Dad had the same whatever that I have... so together we were pretty pitiful. My poor mother.

Before I got sick I hurt my back... like an old lady - WHAT is going on? I can't complain too much... Doc sent me the good pills (the kind that make large family gatherings easier).

Anyways... It's been really great visiting with friends and family and all - but I'm done with this cold. DONE.

Conversation between the husband and me today:

Me: I hate that I've been sick.... I haven't been awake for a full day in almost a week.
Husband: .... yeah? :he looks at me over his glasses... nose pointed down:
Me: Well... I guess that's not so abnormal... I'm just sorry I'm sick.
Husband: Yeah, I thought that's what you meant.

To the individual I sneezed on: I'm really sorry... it sneaked up on me... I'm normally not so disgusting.

I love Christmas.... it's possibly my favorite time of year - but I haven't been able to enjoy it as much as normal. I did manage to keep my scrooge-ness to myself (that is until now). You won't get a "bah humbug" out of me; I still have enjoyed it all... minus the sneezing on strangers.

I had a day.

I had such a day yesterday.

We're all allowed a day every once in a while.

It was a fling-yourself-dramatically-across-the-bed kind of day that turned into a curl-up-into-the-fetal-position and wait for things to feel better kind of day.

It started early, too. Right after we woke up.

As mentioned before: I make lists. My one big list hasn't, for practical reasons- mind you, been completed. It is the CHRISTMAS list.

Yesterday morning all I could think of was getting things done. I was out of town for most of the week and when I got back the husband and I had THREE Christmas parties in 48 hours.

That being said, my husband lived as a bachelor all week with the dogs (and the cat). He did things like eat cheese. Like... while it's still a block. He made steaks and included a special plate for Shep. I can't really say too much- typically when I'm out of town he is productive. Time before last he installed new lighting into the kitchen... making things much brighter and happier. He DID complete a large portion of the Christmas shopping.... which is amazing. Point being: MY HOUSE WAS A DISASTER.

I don't think straight when my house is a disaster and my to-do list is not complete.


So yesterday I woke up to finish addressing Christmas cards. That's right. It was December 17th and my Christmas cards haven't been mailed. I'm sitting there, surrounded by cards, mad at myself that this is even happening.. and then I realized I was missing some addresses.... so I had to email, text, facebook and send telepathic messages to a few people to get their updated address... What I needed was INSTANT GRATIFICATION. So we went to lunch. Because I'm no good without food.

Bought the very last Christmas present of the season. Had a delicious lunch at Big Orange. Then came home with a new perspective on life.. I had a tasty burger in my belly and had completed a couple of things on my list. Next: finish the cards.

The post offices closes at 1 on Saturday. Did you know that?

I didn't.

My feeling of self worth dwindled... (this is where I fling myself across the bed.... dramatically). All I could see was the unwrapped gifts, the cat hair on... everything, my laundry PILES... more than one. At this stage during my Christmas list, I'm supposed to be hearing Christmas music, baking cookies and pretending to be MARTHA STEWART. Or my Mother. Yes, my mother... that's way better.

Then it's a series of "where can I start" thoughts and "HOW did my house get into this kind of condition" thoughts. That's where I curl into the fetal position and bury myself in the bed. I couldn't seem to start doing anything on my list.

There comes a point when I have so much to do and I feel overloaded that I just decide not to do any of it and throw a fit like a 3 year old instead. Because that's productive. It makes complete sense.

My husband digs through the bed to find me smack in the middle. Not that I'm hard to miss... large ball in the middle of the bed - could be a laundry pile: but was me.

He does this magical thing he always does. Those almond shaped green eyes of his are so calming. He gets me to settle down... tells me to take a nap...This is not his first rodeo, no.

When I woke up, I heard Christmas music... and he was on the living room floor wrapping a few gifts.

And the floor was vacuumed. It's a Christmas Miracle. At least, that's what it felt like. 



**This is, of course, the watered down version. There is no way I'll let anyone except for my husband see exactly how crazy I am :)

Let's talk about things that make me feel less like an adult

I'm out of town for work this week. Staying in a hotel. A hotel with those key cards that can be frustrating... but never as frustrating as THIS.

My room has two doors... one on each end of the room. One door opens to the lobby with the gym and pool... the other door opens to a hallway that I suppose service uses because that's where my breakfast came from this morning.

Last night I needed ice. And Ginger Ale. Needed.

I had already showered... had my pjs on... and if you're female you know that once your bra is off for the day, it's not coming back on. Right? right. I'm glad we all agree. I have the same rule with shoes.

Surely the ice machine is right down the hall... right?

I head out without shoes, and with the ice bucket and my arms in awkward positions so as not to expose le boobies. I know. That's just country.  But I'm thinking this is going to be a discrete, quick trip down the hall.

Okay... surely the ice machine is at the other end of the hall that I hadn't explored, right?

Failed mission. I head back to the room... empty ice bucket thinking to myself "this is one of the many reasons I keep the husband around" (I mean, obviously, there are so many other reasons) He wouldn't even need to ask where the ice machine is... he would just go get ice. He has ice machine radar.

When I get back to my room - at the same door I just left - I put the key in: green light! door doesn't open.

Slide card: green light! (flash of excitement).... door doesn't open.

This goes on at lease 12 more times. Finally it opens. This door was messing with me.

So... I do the unthinkable and hoist the ladies back into the bra... put on the only flat shoes I brought - which happen to be leopard print - they totally meshed with my green flannel pants and Razorback T that I stole from JD's T-shirt stash (why are his shirts always more comfortable? Why?) and I head, a little embarrassed that I needed to ask where the stinking ice machine is, to the front desk.

The front desk guy, who clearly loves his job, pretty much rolled his eyes at me and told me to go down a hall no where close to me and then turn right. And then turn right again. Hooray! Ice! Next stop: Ginger Ale. Easy. Done. Heading back to my room with Ginger Ale that I purchased for as much as I could buy a case of it, a bucket full of ice and water that was, apparently, made from unicorn juice because it too was overpriced. I didn't care. I had what I came for.

This time I'm trying the inside door - the other door - facing the lobby. I slide the card. Red light. Red is bad, right?

Slide it again. Green!

no luck.

again, again, again.... green, red, green.....

This is ridiculous.

I go to the OTHER door. Hauling all of my goodies around past the front desk (this guy I KNOW was laughing at me) back to the service hall alllllllllllllll the way to the end where my door is.

slide, slide, slide, slide, SLIDE, SLIDE OH MY GOSH SLIDE. Lights are green. I'm intelligent enough to know that this HAS to be the way to get into my room... why isn't it working? Why am I still in the hallway with my leopard print shoes and freezing hands and MY BRA ON?

I just leaned against the door with my forehead for a minute.

I wasn't about to go around to the OTHER DOOR again.

Slide. GREEN LIGHT! I'M IN.

It only took me 43 minutes to get ice.

Saturday, I love you.

I love Couch Amanda for so many reasons... this is one of them

Conversation from Thursday night - right after work, 6:30ish:

Amanda: HEEEEY, you wanna go workout?

Me (in a not nearly as enthusiastic tone): I was on my feet all day and my back hurts... I want to, but I can't really talk myself into it.

Amanda:HEEEEEY, you wanna hang out on the couch?

:)

It's Saturday morning... and the husband and I are not traveling... we don't have any plans.... there is no agenda. Hooray!! This isn't the sort of thing that if it happened often, I would devalue it... there isn't that "too much of a good thing" element... I'm not afraid of that ever happening. They are rare because of several outside reasons... but also because I don't let them happen enough.

This time of year (especially) it's easy for me to put too much on my plate... I overwhelm myself with things I need to complete, and when I don't complete them I get bummed.... I'm sure I'm not alone in this.... working out was on my list Thursday. It didn't happen - as you can see above - and you can bet I kind of beat myself up about it.

I make lists. Lots of lists. My boss, at this point, knows that if I don't make a list by 10:30 AM - my day is going to be completely useless. Shot. Not productive. I have to make a list to get things done. Otherwise, I'm just aimlessly walking around the office looking for things to do with a vacant look in my eyes.

This habit continues in my non-work related life: I make grocery lists in order of how I walk through the store, I make Christmas lists, I make house cleaning lists and errands lists. I don't chill until my list is complete. Which is why most of my Christmas shopping is all ready done (hello, cyber Monday). The one thing I never include in a list: laundry. I hate laundry. I'll do it when I'm out of clothes. Then, and only then, will my laundry be done.

My lists are helpful (especially my amazing grocery lists) - and necessary for someone who is not naturally organized (like me... without a list, sooo scattered) - but ending the day with items still on my list makes for a cranky Melanie. And I tend to put too much on my list sometimes... it's a vicious cycle. I need to ease up!

I LOVE scratching items off my list. Luckily my husband thinks it's "cute". Or at least that's what he says

my point... because there is one : I don't often allow myself to just do nothing and not feel guilty about it. So sitting on my couch watching last nights DVR'd Chelsea Lately with my Pete, who is actually laying down beside me... even the dog is relaxing today, and blogging in my PJs at 9:58 AM is a treat. I don't have a list for today. Although the ridiculous part of me wants to make a list that simply says : Relax.

Relaxing Pete and my knee.

Oh, and I just had some really great hot tea. I love not being in a hurry.

Living life on the edge. Ha!

Just a side note: My husband introduced me to an app called EverNote - it's amazing. I can make a list on my mac - and it will be on my phone... it saves everything... you can use it to catalog ANYTHING. You can edit it on your phone or computer and it will save... you'll never forget things because they are THERE.  It's a list makers dream come true.